post in rhyme, randomly

a programming job btw, and they wanted an original poem about my last job. OK…

I was a consultant
I liked it a lot
I got laid off on Tuesday
and now I am not

Pages I’d code
In ASP.Net
I’d work really hard
From sunrise to sunset

C# was used
For events and such
Client side had javascript
I used AJAX, but not much

Think I’ll get the job????

Twinkle twinkle little star
Is it cold up where you are?

My AC motor broke at home
I sit around the fan and groan

Twinkle twinkle little star
Is it cold up where you are?

This weekend I will not work
I will be free

This weekend I will stay home
and play with my new Wii

Remember remember the third of December
When we announced pregnant I had got
I see no reason why we commemorate this season
The man you were then you are not

Fuck you, Fuck you, Fuck you
Ain’t this supposed to rhyme?
You’re an ass, I’m glad we’re through
Fuck you, Fuck you, Fuck you

A call from my sister I got today
I listened to the voice mail to hear what she’d say

I thought she had news and it wouldn’t be good
That came from my parents in my old neighborhood

For yesterday I introduced them to my boyfriend, my love
And they never have been supportive, not anything to speak of

No, the sister didn’t say anything of the sort
She had other family news, a little report

She said a rhyme, one I’ve heard before
I laughed when I heard it, almost fell on the floor

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Guess who’s pregnant?
A hint: It’s not me and not you

(My baby sister is having another baby!!! I’m gonna be an auntie again!)

I see my info page here a lot
Usually I just glance at it cursory
Today I paid attention
Hey! Yesterday was my anniversary!

It’s been a whole year
that I’ve been Surly
I did have a prior account
I deleted it too early

I needed a new name
Something that would fit
I thought for a while
and Surly was it

I’m glad I came back here
43 is the best
To all my friends and subs
Thank you! I’ve truly been blessed

Is there a freak magnet upon my back?
What is it about ME that makes you want to attack?

I know I am flawed, only human you see
It must rock to be you, as perfect as perfect can be

You my dear are a BULLY, a mean sort of guy
And although you annoy me, you won’t make me cry

I feel sorry for you, for your need to harass
Blocking all your accounts here is a real pain in my ass

Please leave me alone, find something else to do
You are creepy and mean. Go away! Shoo!

Hickory dickory dock
Ever hear the word “spatchcock”?
I don’t know what it means, but it’s not found in your jeans
Hickory dickory dock

I can not promise “no drama”
‘cause that just isn’t me
I can not promise “no issues”
Life is full of them you see

I’ll always have an ex
He is not really a swell guy
Sometimes I get so depressed
And I can not tell you why

Being with me is never easy
There’s a lot I can’t control
I can promise love, friendship and understanding
And isn’t that your goal?