Old Mar 2, 2008, 02:30 AM
pinkcookiejar
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Question how to get my first love back
Hi this is my first time here, I’m not sure if this question has been asked but I really need help here!
I’m a 20-year-old girl who recently ended a dating relationship with a 22-year-old guy. He asked me to be his girlfriend in December but I said I was not ready and he continued treating me like his girlfriend.
One month ago, he started talking about this new girl around school, whom he has known since last August. I became jealous and cried in front of him but I didn’t tell him I was jealous. What was worst was that I had given him the cold shoulder a week before I found out about the new girl.
The day I cried he told me maybe we should be friends first and that I always giving him the cold shoulder for no reason, without telling him. He said he needed time to think whether we really needed each other, and that he still treated me more than a friend.
I thought it meant he didn’t like me anymore and I was very emotional and I kept thinking about the new girl, even though he tried to reassure me that nothing happened.
In the 2nd week, my friends were hounding him about me and the other girl and he finally said he did not like me as much as before.
In the 3rd week, he did not contact me until my friend’s party one weekend to ask me where it was. During the party, he tried to talk to me but I avoided him. After the party ended, I went home, felt so bad that I sent him an emotional message. He was shocked and said he thought everything was okay.
In the 4th week, it was Valentine’s Day week and I decided to meet him on the 15th to give him a letter explaining my actions. Now I realised that a letter was the wrong move. He was being really nice to me and it felt like before but I gave him really non-interested replies. After he read the letter, he said he really felt like talking to me but he was busy. I saw him studying with the girl and another friend and I felt so bad but I didn’t not ask him about it.
In the 5th week, I tried to message him and ask him how was his work and weekend but I could feel his response was back to the 2nd week, where he said he did not like me as much.
In the 6th week, I asked him when he wanted to talk to me and every time we set a time/place, he would say he forgot or he fell asleep. Finally, I had one hour to him in the car and I asked him about the letter. He said he found it hard to communicate with me because he did not want to say the wrong things and see me cry. I called him up a day later to ask him what was our status and he said “just friends” and I forced him to make a decision on meeting me to talk about the letter.
My friend told me it was the wrong move and I cancelled the meeting. At night, he asked me whether I could talk on the phone but I did not reply his message. At 5am, he asked if I didn’t want to talk to him anymore. I was awake and I said sorry, I fell asleep and that I felt we were actually not ready to talk about anything, since he felt like he couldn’t communicate with me. He said he was afraid of saying the wrong things and he did not want to see me cry. I said that we would talk when we felt ready and his reply was “okay sure..but you can look for me anytime you are bored or need someone to talk to! I will try my best to listen to you..”
I know I have pushed him to the maximum. I also discovered that he took out my picture from his wallet.
I’ve been reading a lot on how to get your boyfriend back..but he was never my boyfriend. However, I really feel he is special to me and I want to try over again.
It has been 5 weeks since he said he did not like me anymore.
